


To All The Nuns: The Only One

by spacewritermonkey



Series: To All The Nuns [2]
Category: Warrior Nun (TV)
Genre: Crack, Crangst, Cruff, F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-10
Updated: 2021-03-10
Packaged: 2021-03-17 06:55:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,252
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29962614
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spacewritermonkey/pseuds/spacewritermonkey
Summary: (You might want to read the piece before this for some parts to make sense.)Ava and (formerly Sister) Beatrice are together. Everyone knows that and everything's cool. Except someone's decided to revive the notes professing their admiration (and some creepiness) for certain people. Like a certain someone who USED to be a nun.
Relationships: Sister Beatrice/Ava Silva
Series: To All The Nuns [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2203737
Comments: 5
Kudos: 57





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> To All the Boys got 3 books AND 3 movies. Does that mean what it means for this storyline? No. But never say never.

It’s been a little over a year since the infamous vandalism that shifted the dynamics among many of the nuns, changed the perspectives of some, shook the sensibilities of a few, changed the lives of a handful, encouraged the feelings of two, and prompted the revoking of vows of just one.

The walls that were once littered with confessions and anonymous messages are now as clean and as shiny as ever. New recruits sometimes hear snippets about the story of how one confession brought on a cascade of other confessions. Some of the stories have gotten convoluted in the process, most of which when retold within hearing range of the original participants produce laughter—or in the case of some, frustration, and a bit of upset.

Amidst all the varying versions, there _is_ one constant and unchanging aspect that involves the Halo Bearer and the former nun Beatrice.

The range of reactions have been entertaining to say the least, particularly when new recruits try to reconcile the woman in the stories with the woman they inevitably meet. Especially when the fact sinks in that Beatrice used to be one of them.

For those new folks, the curiosity and reactions often end there. After all, they have a mission to uphold and a war they still need to win.

But for some…

Well, the curiosity tends to get out of bounds when they meet the “reason” for Sister Beatrice revoking her vows.

* * *

Mary’s on her way to breakfast, walking down the corridor and trying not to let out a wince as she rubs a sore spot right behind her shoulder. Last night’s mission turned a little too rowdy and now she’s paying the price. Hopefully there’s still coffee hot enough to turn her morning around. And speaking of turns…how fortuitous to turn the corner and come across a familiar scene. Mary lets out a loud and no-doubt overly dramatic sigh.

Ava’s back is against the wall, laughing at something Beatrice is saying. The latter has one hand braced on the wall by Ava’s head, unconsciously leaning towards the tad shorter woman as she continued to speak, drawing another laugh from her audience of one.

Mary rolls her eyes.

“Are we in high school? All that’s missing are a bunch of lockers and you carrying around her books or something.”

Her words finally catch their attention, both women turn towards Mary, Beatrice’s cheerful greeting not doing a bit to make the older woman feel any better really.

“Yeah. Morning. Breakfast is that way, in case you two lovebirds are interested in doing more than just flirting around these parts.”

The pair falls into step behind Mary right as Ava giggles.

_Giggles._

Mary rolls her eyes heavenward.

Glancing backwards, she predicts correctly that both have their hands laced together as Beatrice mumbles something that elicits another round of laughter from the younger woman.

“Lord help me. You two were more bearable when you were both pining after each other.”

Thankfully, the trio gets to the dining hall soon enough for Mary to set her sights and full attention on sustenance, rather than the Taylor Swift song happening behind her.

Which is probably why it takes her awhile to notice something being…off.

Except for Beatrice.

The moment she stepped foot inside the huge hall? She knew.

* * *

It had taken Beatrice awhile—a good long while—to get to this point.

What point, you ask?

Oh, just the one where she didn’t immediately crawl into a panic whenever anyone saw her standing a little bit too close to Ava.

That point where she stopped trying to hyper fixate on hers and Ava’s behavior and how others might perceive them when in the company of other people.

Where she no longer felt like she would jump out of her skin whenever Ava so much as grazed her hand in public.

The one where she allowed herself to be the one to reach out for Ava’s hand to hold.

The one where she allowed herself to stop trying to let others’ perceptions—real or imagined—dictate her actions, her life, her relationship…her feelings.

The point where she no longer felt like she was constantly pretending.

But some habits are hard to break.

Some lessons are not quite forgotten.

Just like some skills aren’t easily discarded.

And Beatrice knew for certain they were being watched.

“Bea? Something wrong?” Ava’s question allows her to shift her focus somewhat on a distraction. Something to keep her from wanting to draw out her weapons and determine exactly what the problem was. Eyes were on them and she wanted to know who and why.

Beatrice surreptitiously looks around and observes the shifting of eyes and the quick bowing and turning of heads. She finds herself grasping Ava’s hand a little harder.

“Bea?”

She looks at Ava and tries to muster a grin.

“Is it just me or are we being watched?” She tries for a nonchalant tone, except Ava knows her.

Although before Ava could even try to see for herself if her girlfriend is right, Camila chimes in with a teasing glint in her eyes. “You guys don’t know?”

Turns out their supposedly sweet and made-with-sunshine Camila was also made with parts that reeked of gunpowder that has a tendency of catching fire and exploding when least expected.

Beatrice had a feeling she might not like the answer if she follows it with a question for clarification.

“Don’t know what?” It is Mary who voices the question instead, taking the seat beside Camila.

Camila grins. “The wall is back.”

“What wall?” Ava asks, peering around her girlfriend to look at the nun.

> _Dear Beatrice,_
> 
> _Your reputation does not do you justice. You are even more impressive in person. If you would let me, my only wish would be to know you more._
> 
> _Sincerely,  
>  Your fan_

Beatrice is unsure how to react. She’s been uncertain of what to say for nearly half an hour now.

“I mean, WHAT THE FUCK?!” Ava slams her hand on the desk where the note is laid out. “Ow!”

Beatrice is quick on her feet and asks, “Are you okay?” ready to look at Ava’s hand except her girlfriend goes right back to pacing.

“Seriously? What the fuck, right?!” She thinks the question is addressed to her, but Ava doesn’t even look at her as she paces, muttering every now and then.

“Language please.” Beatrice sighs, moving back to take a seat on the bed.

Upon Camila’s recommendation, they’d looked at the third-floor common bathroom where the first note addressed to Sister Tanya ever made an appearance. The note was exactly where Camila said it would be. She left the identity of the note’s recipient unspoken but the pair had an idea based on the nun’s mischievous grin. Although if asked, Beatrice would have admitted to thinking the note would be addressed to Ava.

But to her surprise—and Ava’s ire—the note held her name. Hers. The former nun took a few moments to let that fact sink in before she began to discard the matter as harmless. Inconsequential.

Ava stared and glared at the note for a good long while.

And then the pacing started.

It was only with the arrival of Lilith that the weird silence was broken. She arrived late for breakfast and after inquiring after the two, Camila had filled her in which of course triggered Lilith’s curiosity.

However, as soon as Lilith reached the bathroom, she only needed to take one look at them before she declared “Nope” and walked right back out.

Beatrice figured she probably shouldn’t have complimented whoever it was who wrote the note.

_“Well at least they were considerate enough to write on an actual piece of paper instead of ruining the wall again.”_

The look on Ava’s face was not entirely pleased.

_“Would you like to thank them for using recycled paper too?”_

And maybe taking a second glance at the note to verify if it _was_ recycled wasn’t a smart move either.

Ava shot her a glare, snatched the note off the wall and walked out, Beatrice naturally trailing after her girlfriend.

Now, here they are in Ava’s room where said owner is still worked up over the note. Although Beatrice observes the younger woman has somewhat slowed down so maybe she can finally break through.

Beatrice reaches out to take her hand, halting Ava’s movement. Once she ensures that she has Ava’s attention, she cajoles the other woman to take a seat beside her while keeping their hands connected as she waits.

Ava takes a deep breath before speaking.

“Everyone knows, right? Hell, even Mother Superion knows.” Ava fidgets with Beatrice’s hand, finally looking up to meet her gaze. “Everyone knows you’re mine, right? And I’m yours?” It’s spoken in a low voice, not a whisper, but not as loud and as confident as Ava usually is. And Beatrice will not stand for it.

She reaches up with her free hand to tuck a stray lock of hair behind Ava’s ear, fingers trailing down to graze the side of her jaw. “They know, Ava. And if by some miracle they didn’t, they will. I’d shout it at dinner tonight if you want.” It’s said in a teasing manner, but it seems to do the trick as Ava chuckles. Beatrice moves to wrap one arm around Ava’s shoulders, drawing her closer to her side, brushing a kiss against her temple.

“Really? You’d do that?” Ava’s tone is joking.

“If that’s what it takes.” Beatrice’s tone is not.

Ava wraps both arms around her girlfriend’s waist. “I’m sorry I got so upset over a stupid note.”

Beatrice is shaking her head as soon as Ava dispensed the word “sorry.”

“No need for apologies, Ava.”

But the younger woman insists. “Well, I’m sorry anyway. It shouldn’t be a thing, but I made it into one. I’m just…” Ava sighs as the other knows best to wait her out.

“That wall was MY IDEA! HOW DARE THEY USE THAT TO TRY AND WRITE TO YOU!!!”

Silence.

Beatrice stares at her girlfriend with a look the Warrior Nun can’t quite read.

“You…” she tries to speak but trails off.

Ava bites her lower lip nervously, eyes shifting between her girlfriend and some dirt on the floor.

And then the former nun opens her mouth

“You vandalized OCS property! You started the whole thing??! That was you!!!”

The younger woman gets up on her feet and starts to pace again.

“Would it help my case if I tell you maybe it wasn’t 100% my idea?”

Beatrice crosses her arms.

Ava starts waving her arms around.

“You can’t get upset! That was basically the thing that brought us together!”

The furrow between Beatrice’s eyebrows seems to lessen. Maybe. So, Ava tries again.

“Who knows how much longer I’d be pining after you if it weren’t for written confessions on bathroom walls?”

The beginnings of what looked to be a smug grin teases Beatrice’s lips.

“You were pining? For me?”

Ava rolls her eyes. “That’s what you got from what I said?”

“Would you like to return to the topic of you instigating the mess that took over—not just one bathroom, by the way—but _three_ bathrooms?”

Ava throws her arms around Beatrice’s neck—and her entire weight to follow—as she exclaims “YES! Yes, I pined for you, you sexy former nun you!”

> _Dear Beatrice, I didn’t know just how much leather could do so much for one’s wardrobe._
> 
> _Sincerely, a fan_
> 
> _Dear Beatrice, maybe we could spar again soon. The view from under you has been incomparable. Sincerely, a fan_

Two more notes appeared.

Judging by the handwriting and the theme of the notes, the writers were different. Thankfully, they copied the first’s style of writing on paper and sticking it onto the wall. Breakfast that morning was noisier than usual. It started as a hum brought on by whispers that escalated into a low sort of buzz that belied the excitement of the those whose interests were piqued. There was a barely noticeable pause once Beatrice and Ava entered the hall once more.

This time, it was Ava who noticed. And she had an inkling as to the cause.

Before they could even finish their food, Ava nearly drags Beatrice by the arm up and out of the hall. The three other members of their team take one look at the fleeing pair and decide to follow.

_It has begun_ , Ava cringed internally.

Ava plucks the notes from the wall before handing it over to Beatrice, who looks strangely at her girlfriend, and then at the notes in her hand. “What am I supposed to do with these?”

“Do with it as you wish.” Ava mutters.

Lilith lets out a laugh. “Can you guys imagine if that thing catches on again? I don’t think Mother Superion would let it pass this time.”

Ava crosses her arms and glares at Lilith as if the other woman was responsible for all that had happened.

“That’s exactly why we’re taking these down. Boss lady won’t be upset if there isn’t a thing to fuss about.”

Mary decides to chime in, “Suuuuure. Let’s go with that.” The drawn-out word and her tone implying a lot save for believing Ava.

Ava turns instead to Camila, hoping to get some support but the petite nun shakes her head. “I think Mother Superion knows. I just left the bathroom when she happened to pass by and told me she’s glad she wouldn’t have to invest in another batch of cleaning agents.”

No one speaks up about their doubts that Mother Superion just _happened_ to pass by.

“To be fair, sticking the notes instead of outright spreading ink on the walls isn’t such a bad idea.” Lilith points out.

Mary and Camila nod along.

Glancing at Beatrice, Ava catches her girlfriend stopping mid-nod, who then gives her a sheepish smile.

“For the record, it was Camila’s idea which specific pen and ink would prove to be hardest to erase.”

Camila whips around to point a finger at Ava, “You asked me for help!”

“I _just_ wanted to know how to fold those paper swan things to give to Bea! You started talking and next thing I know—” Ava motions widely towards the wall in question.

“You said you wanted a GRAND gesture!” Camila points at Beatrice without taking her accusing eyes at Ava.

“Then why couldn’t we have just given her a GRAND FUCKING SWAN PAPER?!”

“ENOUGH!”

Both turn towards Beatrice who has her eyes closed and arms crossed. She takes a deep breath and looks at Ava.

“First off, I think you mean origami. Please stop calling it a paper swan or swan paper, because I’m also pretty certain you actually mean a crane—and no, I’ll explain later.” Beatrice holds up a finger to preemptively cut off Ava who opened her mouth for what was sure to be a follow up question.

Beatrice then turns to look at Camila. “Second. Thank you, Camila. ‘What ifs’ are futile to explore at this point, but I _am_ grateful that with your help, Ava and I found our way towards each other.”

The beginnings of a smile on Camila’s face drops just as quickly as Beatrice’s shift to a serious expression. “Third, I do hope you’ve learned your lesson when it comes to ‘ideas’ and Ava.”

“Hey!”

Beatrice offers Ava a lovesick smile, “I still love you, though.”

To which Ava’s pout morphs into a stupid grin. “Totally.”

“Where’s a tarask when you need one.” Mary rolls her eyes and turns to leave.

> _Dear Beatrice, some days I cannot understand how you could give up your vows. I see you and her and ask “why?” Sincerely, a fan_
> 
> _Dear Beatrice, in some ways I find myself envying you. To live and love as you do. Sincerely, a fan_
> 
> _Dear Sister Camila, what I would give to be part of your inventory. Sincerely, a fan_
> 
> _Dear Sister Lilith, I knew you from before you were a nun. I wish you could remember me and know just how much I admired you then—still do, in fact. Sincerely, a fan_
> 
> _Dear Mary, if only you’d look hard enough, maybe you’d find Sister Shannon wasn’t the only one who looked at you the way she did. Sincerely, a fan_

Mary storms into the library, unmindful of the harsh whisper of admonishment for silence as she marches straight onto the desk where Ava and Beatrice are both engrossed in a book. Or at least Beatrice is, with one hand intertwined with Ava as the latter has her chin propped in her free hand, staring at her favorite nun-turned-girlfriend.

Their friend’s loud entry disrupts them, however, and whatever teasing remark is on the tip of Ava’s tongue immediately dissipates at the look on said friend’s face.

A hand slams the remains of a crumpled note on the desk in front of them.

“Ava, I swear to God this really better be none of your idea.”

The pair peeks at the note and when “Sister Shannon” registers in their brain, the look of horror on both swiftly assuages Mary that her friends had nothing to do with it.

“Mary, I swear to you I didn’t. I didn’t even have anything to do with the resurrection of this stupid shit!” Ava’s voice has risen considerably to garner a number of dirty looks as well as a much louder “ssshhhh” from the other nuns in the room.

Ava rolls her eyes and turns to one table in particular, “Was it ‘shit’ or the ‘resurrection’? Coz if it’s the latter, my second life begs to differ.”

“Perhaps we should continue discussing this outside.” Beatrice is quick to pull down Ava’s other hand, well-versed in the knowledge that the younger woman is about to flip off another nun.

In the hallway, Mary starts pacing as she tears note to pieces.

“This shit might have been cute the first time around. But not anymore.”

“Look. I’m not defending what they wrote—whoever they may be—but I don’t think they meant to do harm, Mary.” Beatrice’s tone is soft, trying to comfort and at the same time reason with her friend. She will not be the one to dare point out how long it has been. After all, there are certain pains in life that knows no time. It just exists in different sizes, but it remains.

“I don’t care! They shouldn’t be mentioning her name at all. Not on that stupid wall or for whatever stupid reason!”

“Then tell them.”

Mary stops pacing and looks incredulously at Ava. “What?”

Ava knows she’s on thin ground and even Beatrice at her side might not be enough, so she hastens to clarify. “Write them a note. Tell them that you won’t stand for anyone bringing up the name of a fallen Warrior Nun, especially for some stupid wall of confessions.”

Mary is silent, her face unreadable, and it takes a few terse beats before something that looks like relief and determination dawns on her and she offers a nod in Ava’s direction. “You’re right.”

“I’m right?”

“Don’t push it.”

> _To everyone who dares to participate on this wall of stupid confessions:_
> 
> _Don’t ever include Sister Shannon’s name in your notes. NEVER._

The car ride back from a scouting mission that night was rife with tension. No one could deny that Mary had been in fine form. Whether she was still reeling from her anger that morning or not, no one wanted to ask, but she had been on a rampage striking down a number of people possessed by wraiths.

“I’m fine.” Mary’s voice thankfully breaks the silence as she drives.

Camila audibly sighs. “I would just like to say that I’m sorry anyone thought it would be anything but offensive to have to mention our sister in such a note.”

Lilith raises her hand from the front passenger seat. “I’m not saying I envy you guys, but why does mine sound like I have a stalker?”

Ava snorts. “Why? What does your fan have to say?”

Lilith struggles not to roll her eyes or throw anything at Ava but shows them a photo she took of the note instead.

Ava laughs.

“It’s not funny.”

“Why didn’t you just tear it down?” Beatrice asks, gesturing at the image on her phone.

“I did. Burned it too. I took a photo to ensure I can track down that person by their handwriting.”

Camila groans. “Something tells me you’ll be asking me to track them down for you.”

Lilith smirks. “You’re the smart one with computers. Help out a sister, will you?”

“Fuck!” Mary’s exclamation startles them.

“Fuck! You’re right! Sonofa—I shouldn’t have immediately destroyed that note. I could have asked you to help me track them down!” She looks at Camila through the rearview mirror.

“And then what, Mary?” Beatrice bravely asks.

“I don’t know. But I definitely would have loved to give them my thoughts on what they wrote.”

“Okay. Look. Let’s just ignore them all, okay? Can we agree on this?” Ava proposes.

Beatrice gives her girlfriend a look.

Ava’s eyes are wide and innocent. “What?”

“That sounds sensible. Why do you sound sensible?” Lilith frowns at her with outright concern.

Ava shrugs. “What, am I not allowed to have good ideas? You guys just don’t give me enough credit.”

Beatrice is quick to assure her, “We do, Ava. You’re smart and you really do have great ideas.”

“Yeah. It’s just your ideas a little too chaotic for your own good.” Lilith supplies.

Camila clears her throat. “I think Bea has really been a good influence on you.”

Ava grins at that. “I think Bea has rubbed off on me really well. If you know what I mean.” She winks at her girlfriend.

The car behind them suddenly brakes in panic as they can see the black van in front begin to swerve before stopping. As they cautiously pass by the stalled vehicle, they hear someone shout from within.

“We didn’t need to know about THAT!”

> _Dear Beatrice,_
> 
> _“I may not have been sure about what really did interest me, but I was absolutely sure about what didn’t.”_
> 
> _I know you know._
> 
> _Sincerely,  
>  Your fan_

A few days passed and though the Halo Bearer and her team have mostly ignored the flood of fan notes, the gossip around them continued and snippets of the notes’ contents managed to reach them.

Camila and Ava are poring over a computer as the former tries to teach Ava and get her more updated with her knowledge of technology, particularly the ones they use in the order. So far, the nun is comforted by Ava’s progress. The Warrior Nun has yet to appear bored. It seems the novelty of pushing and tapping buttons and keys were still in play and right up Ava’s alley.

It had been their habit to exchange stories in between or during lesson and today was no different.

Remembering something she’d recently overheard, Camila casually mentions how the notes addressed to Beatrice appear to be growing. The other sisters in the order were receiving their fair share, even Lilith, Camila, Mary, and Ava in fact, were getting notes addressed to them, but some have been noticing that a few of the notes addressed to Beatrice held a certain flare.

“What do you mean?” Ava asks somewhat absentmindedly as she tries to remember the shortcut keys Camila taught her yesterday.

“Apparently some of the notes were in French. One was even in Latin. And a bunch of them appear to be quotes from some book. I don’t know. I’m just relaying what I overheard earlier.” Camila shrugs.

Ava sighs in exasperation. “They’re probably trying to appeal to the brain in Beatrice.”

Camila chuckles, “It’s nice to see that you’re taking this well, Ava.”

“What can I say? I’m an adult, Camila. And I love and trust Beatrice. Just as I know she feels the same.”

> _To whom it may concern,_
> 
> _Must suck to be not-Beatrice’s-girlfriend._
> 
> _Sincerely, a fan_

It’s late and Ava means to be on her way to Beatrice’s room. Raiding the kitchen for a snack was supposed to be easy until the cook decided to start hiding some of her favorite items. Guess it wasn’t exactly a secret that Ava could phase through walls and the cook realized they had to get creative in hiding certain food items that had a habit of disappearing overnight.

Coincidentally, Ava happens past the infamous bathroom and nearly runs into another nun exiting said room.

Ava offers up an apologetic smile and a “Sorry” but is surprised to be rebuffed with an arched eyebrow and then a small smirk before walking the other way.

Flipping a finger at the nun’s back, Ava is about to resume walking but is stopped by niggling curiosity.

Looking back down the end of the corridor to where the nun has disappeared, Ava makes a decision.

And walks into the bathroom.

> _Dear Beatrice,_
> 
> _“La liberté est le droit de faire tout ce que les lois permettent.” How unfair is it that I have to discover you and realize my liberty is far from yours?_
> 
> _Sincerely,  
>  Your fan_
> 
> _Dear Beatrice,_
> 
> _“Every one sees what you appear to be, few really know what you are.”_
> 
> _But I do. I see you and know you. I hope she sees you and knows you just as well. Though I doubt she could fare ever more than I._
> 
> _Sincerely,  
>  Your fan_
> 
> _Dear Beatrice,_
> 
> _“Autem sunt quaedem official servanda etiam adversus eos, a quibus acceperis injuriam._
> 
> _Nam cum sint duo genera decertandi, unum per disceptationem, alterum per vim; que cum illud sit proprium hominis, hoc beluarum: est confugiendum ad posterius, si licet non uti superiore.”_
> 
> _Sincerely,  
>  Your fan_
> 
> _Dear Beatrice,_
> 
> _I hope you’ll forgive me if you feel I’ve overstepped. Words have taken over my being and have taken hold of my dreams. It is no longer enough to arrange them into a semblance of order, nor is it enough to allow others the capacity to judge me in my measly attempt at conveying the depths of how I feel._
> 
> _Until I hear from you, I shall take your silence as absolution._
> 
> _Sincerely,  
>  Your fan_
> 
> _Dear Beatrice,_
> 
> _I find myself envious of the Halo Bearer, yet I also find myself relieved. What it must be like to carry the burden of the Halo and be committed to share in that burden as well? I would not wish that for you. I couldn’t. Perhaps I envy you as well. Your liberty allows you the means to release you from the laws we live in. If only._
> 
> _Sincerely,  
>  Your fan_
> 
> _Dear Beatrice,_
> 
> _I wish you could see the light. Perhaps then, the Halo Bearer would follow and begin to understand. Does this life not suffocate you? It’s like being buried deep beneath the ground. It gets harder and harder to breathe._
> 
> _Relief can only come when someone—and they must be an angel to appear in that fortunate hour—to reach deep inside you, showing you the truth. Truth you may not be prepared to see, but that which is inevitable._
> 
> _The Halo Bearer would know._
> 
> _Sincerely,  
>  Your fan_

“What the fuck?” Ava hisses, her eyes growing wider as she reads just a few of the notes clumped together, obviously penned by a singular form of handwriting.

“I was wondering when you’d get around to reading them.”

The strange voice has Ava suddenly turning and reaching for a weapon on her side at the same time. A weapon that wasn’t there.

Fuck.

It’s the smirking nun from earlier, Ava realizes.

She’s trying to recall the name, but Ava can’t seem to put a finger on it. She does know that the nun was from the latest batches of recruits. But she’s rarely seen her. Ava thinks her name starts with a T.

Before she can even throw the question as to who she is, the mystery nun begins to speak.

“I’ve been waiting awhile. Trying to figure out how to reach out to you.”

Ava snorts. “You do know there’s a thing called a phone. I could have given you my number.”

The nun had the gall to chuckle as she clasps her hands behind her, her posture eerily similar to someone Ava knows well. It’s disconcerting.

“But that wouldn’t be nearly as effective. Not like this.”

“Listen, I’m not sure what your angle is, but I trust Beatrice. And no language lessons or brainy quotes from Google will make me doubt where Beatrice’s heart is: which, in case you didn’t get in the first place, is with me.”

Laughter resonates weirdly inside the bathroom.

If Ava believed in ghosts and eerie things, she might say she felt mightily creeped out.

And then…the words from the last message sinks in.

_Buried._

_Underground._

_Reach inside you._

_Angel._

The look on her face must be obvious as the nun actually starts to clap slowly.

“At least you’re not as dumb as the others like to think.”

Ava feels like she’s frozen.

Frozen and unable to move just like when she was caught deep inside several feet of stone.

Despite her panic, something in her must have called out to the Halo as she feels the familiar warmth in her back growing.

“Oh. No need for that, Ava. I’m actually not here for that.” The tone is chiding, and it grates on Ava’s nerves enough to loosen her tongue.

“What the fuck for then?”

“I want you to think about this really hard, Ava. I know. _He_ knows. He knows exactly what a burden it must be to try and fight a battle that could cost you not just your life—but of others. Fighting a battle that humans can’t possibly even fathom.”

Ava’s hands clench into fists.

She knows where this is leading.

She hopes she’s wrong but sadly, she may be right for a change.

The nun smiles and motions towards the wall.

“And he knows just how much she means to you, Ava.”

“Don’t you dare even think about getting close to Beatrice!” Ava starts to charge but the nun disappears and a voice from behind her is her only warning before Ava finds herself slamming against the opposite wall.

She grunts in pain and opens her eyes to see the nun smiling like she was humoring the younger woman.

“Get close? Ava, I’m pretty sure I’ve demonstrated just how close I can get to Beatrice. After all, I believe some of my notes have made their way to her room at the very least.”

Hearing those words, Ava feels herself start to shake as she tries to get back on her feet. The Halo is doing its job in healing her but the pain—and the fear remains.

 _No way. She’s lying_ , Ava chants to herself.

The other woman makes a point of looking at her wristwatch before giving Ava another small smirk.

“I have to go. I’d love to explain further but I’m expected elsewhere. He needs an update, you see.”

Ava tries to run headfirst onto the other woman again, fear and rage making her forget she has no weapon at all, but the woman disappears, and Ava turns just in time to see her materialize by the doorway.

She holds up a hand and does a little wave before issuing her parting words.

“Think about it, Ava. Every battle you’ll ever fight. Every call for help you answer. Every moment you are with her or without her. He knows who to look for.”

And then she was gone.

Ava sat slumped on the floor, staring up at the wall filled with varying sizes of notes, filled with words and confessions and feelings and…

She reaches out a hand to skim the nearest note.

> _Dear Beatrice, I hope you won’t mind me saying so. But I admire you a lot for doing what you did. You and Ava are amazing together. I hope you both stay as happy as you are together for a long time. Sincerely, a fan_

With a shaky hand, Ava pulls out her phone and sees the message from Beatrice asking where she is. Trying to calm her racing heart, Ava taps on a button to make the call.

“Ava? Where are you? Please don’t tell me you’ve been to the kitchen again!”

Ava tries to speak, but…

“Ava?”

“Did you receive any notes?” Ava finally manages to croak out.

“Are you okay? You sound…where are you?” The Warrior Nun hears the sound of rustling and imagines Beatrice must already in bed and is now in the midst of getting out of it.

“Just please answer the question, Bea. Did you get any notes?”

The sound of a sigh travels over the line. “What notes, Ava?”

“You know what I mean! Those stupid confession love notes or letters, whatever else you wanna call it!”

Silence reigns over the line for a few moments as both realize that Ava has never raised her voice in that manner at Beatrice. Not even in anger. Ever.

“Bea—”

“I have. If that’s what you really need to know. Yes, I did receive notes. Some were slipped under my door. But Ava, you know that it doesn’t mean—”

“Did you read them?”

Another sigh.

“Yes.”

“And?”

“And what? It held nothing but the usual, Ava. And then I threw them away.”

“Did it look like they all came from the same person?”

“I know they came from the same person, Ava.”

“What?” Ava’s grip on her phone gets tighter.

“I even know who it is. She approached me early this afternoon to ask if I’ve received them and when I said yes, she apologized before I could even tell what I thought about her attempts and to tell her to stop writing.”

Ava’s grip on her phone loosens, whatever else Beatrice says gets lost, her mind running on overtime on how close it had been.

And she would never have known.

“Ava?”

The frantic sound of her name penetrates through the fog of Ava’s mind enough to rouse her and get her to put the phone back against her ear.

“I’m here.”

“Will you tell me what’s wrong? And where you are?” The sound of rustling clothes decides it for Ava.

“I’ll explain when I get there. I’ll see you soon.”

“Oh. Okay. Well, hurry up already because you said we had to watch Frozen 2 together.”

Ava musters a semblance of a smile just as a tear touches the corner of her lips.

“I’ll be right there.”

Ava stares back up at the wall and litter of notes.

She carefully stands up and spies a marker seemingly forgotten atop one of the nearby sinks.

 _How fortuitous_ , Ava thinks, chuckling at herself for finally being able to use that word of the day she just learned last week.

She picks it up and spots a blank wall.

Remembering the very last words she wrote on this wall, Ava begins.

_Dear Beatrice, I would give up the halo for you._


	2. Chapter 2

Ava puts the cap back onto the marker and sets on lowering her hand to place it back where she found it, but is surprised by a hand covering hers, unable to let go.

And looks up to see Beatrice staring at her with a somber expression.

“Don’t.”

It’s all she says.

But the tears make their way down Ava’s face anyway as she starts to shake her head.

“I can’t.”

Ava tries to pull her hand free, but instead of letting go, Beatrice wraps her arms around her tightly.

“All these thoughts are running through my head, trying to understand, trying to make sense of why you’d write that. But do you know what thought stands clear above it all?”

Shaking her head, Ava finds herself returning the embrace despite her earlier intention to run.

“That I love you and I _know_ you love me too. So, no matter what the reason is that made you write those words down like some sort of farewell…I can handle it. We both can.”

Ava pulls back just enough to look her in the eyes.

“I would give up the halo for you. You know I would.”

“I don’t doubt it. You’re a lot of things but dishonest.” Beatrice keeps one arm around Ava as she pushes hair away from Ava’s eyes.

“Stay with me. Please. If this has anything to do with what I’m beginning to think it is…stay with me and fight _with_ me. Don’t let anyone come between us. Not now. Not ever.”

“Bea…” Ava’s resolve is weakening. It’s one of the reasons she’d been gearing to run so quickly. She can’t stand to see the look in Beatrice’s eyes, lined with resolve, but a part that is so used to being abandoned and disappointed is still there.

“Don’t give up. That’s all I ask. Don’t give up the halo, don’t give up on us, don’t give up on me…” and then a tear falls from Beatrice’s eyes and Ava crumbles.

Ava kisses Beatrice hard as she mutters against the other’s lips, “I won’t. I won’t. I would never give up on you. Never. I would give up a lot of things and I’d give up on myself but never you. I love you too much.”

> _Dear Ava, I would give up everything but you. Only you._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope that made sense. I'm a few hours away from my alarm making itself known. Pardon the errors throughout.

**Author's Note:**

> We need The Half of It sequel at the very least if the likes of TOATB can get 3. Just saying.


End file.
